Telling the truth is something that every parent wants to instill in their child, but their teachings do not always bear the expected results. It is very frustrating to realize that your child sometimes lies. But instead of scolding or hitting your child, you should try to understand what causes the child to lie.
The minds of children are very gentle, they are formed from what is happening around. Understanding their psychology is what parents should strive for first.
You can find out all about parenting on this page. In the meantime, here are the most common reasons why children lie to their parents:
1. Self-defense
The biggest fear in every child's life is the punishment for their wrongdoings. This is the reason why children come up with various imaginary stories to escape their parents' reprimands.
When they see that all the doors are closed for escape, they begin to lie. From blaming siblings or pets to making false excuses for stomach pain for not learning, using these tactics to escape their parent's anger.
They feel insecure when they tell the truth, knowing that it can lead to punishment or rebuke from their parents. Over time, this becomes a habit as they feel safe hiding from the lies.
2. "No" from parents
Children often lie for fear of being rejected by their parents for their requests. Sometimes they want to go to a party or just get together with friends, but their previous experience of not getting parental consent leads them to lie. Children do not understand the reason for refusal, and this makes them turn into liars. However, if each parent explained to his child why he was denied a certain request, there would be no place to keep secrets or lies.
3. Maintain a good impression
Parents often compare their children to others, and this creates feelings of jealousy as well as despair in the child. For the sake of this, children often lie to be praised and loved by their parents. This can be seen in the example when some of the children try to brag that they are praised by the teachers in school, when in fact they are scolded almost every day.
The best way to keep a child from doing this is not to reproach him / her all the time by comparing him / her to others, but to try to find and encourage the hidden talents they may have.
4. Idolization
Children usually begin to imitate a certain celebrity, a movie character, trying to draw inspiration from the characters they see on TV. They tend to imitate their idols and sometimes to their own detriment. Sometimes children take bad examples and try to speak, act and behave like their idols, and this leads them on the wrong path.
Suppose they idealize a cartoon character who lies and bully other people, and the child, in order to look like, would also start doing the same. In such cases, parents need to keep a close eye on their children and control what their children are watching and who they value and look up to.
5. Profitable motive
We know that today almost everyone is guided by their own personal benefit. Although we do not inherit these selfish qualities by birth, we absorb them when interacting with the world around us. From the very beginning, children start learning to work in order to make some profit.
The simplest example of this can be seen when a child is told that he must do well in school and get good grades in order to receive gifts, candy, or toys. This teaches them lucrative profits, but when they fall short of their parents' expectations, they start lying.
6. Countermeasures
From an early age, children have a basic nature to tell only the truth, but sometimes parents are impatient and react in an overly aggressive way. Therefore, the next time, fearing the same reaction that manifests itself in swearing and even in beatings, the baby prefers to tell lies in order to avoid swearing or rude behavior of his parents.
Suppose if a child breaks some expensive vase and admits it, but he is still punished, then next time he or she will seek to avoid the truth by placing the blame on someone else.
The best way to deal with this situation is to eliminate all anger and handle it with patience and calmness.
7. Restrictions set by parents
Freedom is what every person is inclined to. Children are often denied freedom of choice and are often subject to various types of restrictions, such as what time to come home, clothes, where to go, and so on. Too many restrictions make children lie to their parents.
They do this to break the chains and openly make the choices they want. They begin to compose stories in various situations to avoid further interrogation. Of course, it is good to keep children in discipline, but parents must also consider the needs of the children so as not to chain them in a chain of restrictions.
8. Dealing with parental lies
If you want to achieve positive results from your children, it is better to start with yourself and be a good example for them. Sometimes children are confronted with lies that parents have said or said in order to avoid a situation, whether from personal or professional life. It leaves an imprint on the minds of children, and they feel it's okay when you lie to get out of embarrassing situations.
9. Tensions
The family environment should be healthy and conducive to the overall development of the child. In those families where the relationship between parents or with other members is tense, children feel trapped, and if any unfavorable condition arises, they try to hide from them behind lies in order to keep the peace in the family. Children then feel comfortable in the fact that they are lying and running away from the truth, thinking that by doing so they are saving the family.
10. Peer pressure
It is important for parents to keep track of which company the child chooses.
It is a generally accepted fact that your personality is shaped more closely with the type of friends you associate with. Sometimes children end up in bad company where they are encouraged to talk about their parents and teachers. They fall into the trap of such friends and behave the way others want to, in order to create a bold image in front of them.
We recommend watching:
Video on why children lie to their parents from MarinaMaid
